Fight Club Quotes

God d*mn! We just had a near-life experience, fellas.

Tyler

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Tyler: You know why they put oxygen masks on planes?

Narrator: So you can breathe.

Tyler: Oxygen gets you high. In a catastrophic emergency, you’re taking giant panicked breaths. Suddenly you become euphoric, docile. You accept your fate. It’s all right here. Emergency water landing – 600 miles an hour. Blank faces, calm as Hindu cows.

Narrator: That’s, um… That’s an interesting theory.

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He was full of pep. Must’ve had his grande-latte enema.

Narrator

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A condom is the glass slipper for our generation. You slip one on when you meet a stranger. You dance all night, and then you throw it away. The condom, I mean, not the stranger.

Marla

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A guy who came to Fight Club for the first time, his ass was a wad of cookie dough. After a few weeks, he was carved out of wood.

Narrator

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A house full of condiments and no food… how embarrassing.

Narrator

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After fighting, everything else in your life got the volume turned down.

Narrator

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All the ways you wish you could be, that’s me. I look like you wanna look, I f*ck like you wanna f*ck, I am smart, capable, and most importantly, I am free in all the ways that you are not.

Tyler

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And then, something happened. I let go. Lost in oblivion. Dark and silent and complete. I found freedom. Losing all hope was freedom.

Narrator

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Bob had bitchtits..

Narrator

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D

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Marla: I wish I could return the favor. [after giving Marla a breast exam]

Narrator: There’s not a lot of breast cancer in the men in my family.

Marla: I could check your prostate.

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Every evening I died, and every evening I was born again, resurrected..

Narrator

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Marla: There are things about you that I like. You’re smart, you’re funny, you’re… spectacular in bed… But you’re intolerable! You have very serious emotional problems, deep seated problems for which you should seek professional help.

Narrator: I know, and I’m sorry…

Marla: Yeah, you’re sorry, I’m sorry, everybody’s sorry, but I can’t do this anymore. I can’t. And I won’t. I’m gone.

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Except for their humping, Tyler and Marla were never in the same room. My parents pulled this exact same act for years..

Narrator

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