Legally Blonde Quotes
Elle, if I’m gonna be a senator, I need to marry a Jackie, not a Marilyn.
So what’s a girl to do? He’s a guy who followed his pecker to greener pastures. I’m a middle aged, high school dropout with stretch marks and a fat ass.
Emmett: I can’t believe you just called me a butthead. I don’t think anybody has called me a butthead since the 9th grade. Elle: Maybe not to your face. Insult
Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don’t shoot their husbands. They just don’t!
Paulette: Is she as pretty as you?
Elle: She could use some mascara and some serious highlights, but she’s not completely unfortunate looking.
He’s engaged! She’s got the six-carat Harry Winston on her bony, unpolished finger.
The rules of hair care are simple and finite. Any Cosmo girl would have known.
Vivian: Nice costume.
Elle: You too. Except when I dress up as a frigid b*tch, I try not to look so constipated.
I feel comfortable using legal jargon in everyday life. [someone whistles at her] I object.
There’s nothing I love better than a dumb blonde with Daddy’s plastic.
Vivian: You know, I’m still shocked that you didn’t give Callahan the alibi.
Elle: It wasn’t my alibi to tell.
Vivian: I know, I thought that was very… classy of you.
I once had to judge a tighty-whitey contest for Lambda Kappa Pi. Trust me, I can handle anything.
Warner: Hey, well, don’t you look like a walking felony.
Elle: Thanks, you’re so sweet. [sees Elle in her Bunny costume]